TANNED...RESTED...READY???
They call this the Popa!?

When I was young, I had a stuffed animal named Boris...I loved him. But I vomited on him regularly...bodily functions all about his foamy interior...

My parents did the ole' switcheroo one night while I lay sleeping...The next morning I had a brand new Boris. A Boris that looked neither dirty nor old like the old Boris just one night previous...
And now we turn to the Pope...and with his reappearance, I am going to completely speculate here that the Vatican is trying to pool the wool over the eyes of the flock...

The Pope brought his Popemobile home tonight from the hospital...Vatican officials said he was "cured". Yep. Real quote. "Cured."

BUT WHICH POPE!? The old, feeble, tired Pope, or the new eyes-fixated plastic waxy Pope?

While my speculation may be scoffed at, turn your unblinking eyes to the photos:



AND



The second picture was from today...odd eyes...no teeth in?

What gives...

Enquiring minds need to know. Is the Vatican doing their part to calm fears of the flock? Is the Vatican trying to pass off a fake Pope?

MORE PHOTOS FROM AP:

A larger Pope??
A stone-eyed Pope?
Or, as this picture proves, a Pope that almost saw death...


While my hypothesis for a part-time pretend Pope may be completely blown out of the water by facts and common sense, it's just sad and somewhat amazing to see how through all the licking John Paul keeps on ticking......
But what's amazing and even more sad is that the Vatican releases a statement that the Pope is "cured" of what ails him...There's no defeating the wrath of old age...


BRYAN SMOLOCK THE HORROR-REPORT THURSDAY FEBRUARY 10 2005 6:24PM EDT

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